You've been on my mind.

I'm in love. I'm so in love its ridiculous and irrevocable. Only Adele and Etta are helping.

Charming Little Valentine

I'm only making one valentine this year. Which is odd because I generally hate how commercialised Valentine's day and throw an iHate the Commercialised V-Day party every year. Which I am doing, but this is the valentine I made. It's obviously for a special someone. ;)

This idea is purely from  Mr. Kate.com.

Basically what you do is get a page from an old book (or a book that's not really aged looking but sits on your shelf) and underline little phrases that, taken out of context, are loving or erotic (cough cough dirty cough cough) and then leave a big ol' kiss mark and finally, if you wish, write something cute.

And TAH DAH! you have a very original, absolutely free, and vintage Valentine that will surely make a statement!

Easy Peasy Lemon Poppyseedy

So I just made some yummy lemon poppy seed muffins! MMMMmmmmm! :)

Heres the recipe: I used a Krusteaz box. haha :P

LOL

It's awesome! enjoy! :)

An Education

I'm home sick for another week-Doctor's orders.
My cat won't let me leave her sight she is so attached, I fear it's an irrevocable bond. And I've been wasting away the week watching films I've never had the time to go see (thank you Netflix Instant Play!) such as The Young Victoria, Bright Star and An Education. They are my current favourites! These films are so honest and well done. I'm in love!  Oh, speaking of love, Le Boyfriend left a while ago, and quite frankly, I'm pleased. ;) But anyhoo! The best part is, they finally put my favourite film of all time on to Netflix instant play! Wait for it......drum roll please! Moulin Rouge starring Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor (yes please! mmmmm!) !


I'm so excited. It's not even funny.

But then my room-mate brought all my school work home for me, and well, that burst the bubble a bit. I'm supposed to be memorizing several scenes and doing a physics study and history essay as I type! But oh well. I have another week of bed rest to get it done!

Adios for now!
xoxoxo
Hannah

could you just....?

So....I'm home sick for two weeks, which sucks, because I'm bored out of my skull! So I've spent the day online window shopping! It's great because you go online to your favorite stores and fill up a cart of all the things you want (but can't always afford)  and then leave! It also helps because you can find what you really want to save up for and purchase in the future.

Well I found this on Topshop and almost died. I'm a huge sucker for romantic lace and chiffon and creme and flowy and....and.... I can't speak English anymore! Awesome.

gorgeousness


so...yeah....
and lettuce wraps are awesome! and i'm not vegan anymore because my doctor said my lack of iron and protein are culprits to the severity of my illness.

so sad.   :(

an experiment.

So I've been writing lately. This is just a short story, but it's a huge step for me. I've only ever shown two people stories I've written. So, this is huge for me. I know it's not great, but feel free to comment with your input or suggestions! :D













“ ‘Can you blame me?’ she screamed. ‘I’m made to be a perfect little girl! I have to have to do this I have to do that!’ She breathed deeply and fell into a soft chair. ‘I....I can’t....’ she just whispered.”

  “Grandma....do you have to tell me my own fate?” a little boy asked. He always knew he would be the one to lose the love of his life. He’d been raised thus far by bitter old women who always told him to never even converse with a woman. He’d been told a billion times that love only kills, and he’d read more than enough literature to prove it. Forever would quotes from Dracula, Othello, Romeo and Juliet, and Tristan & Isolde haunt him. And he didn’t care.

He didn’t care when his mother and grandmother screamed at pictures of lost loves. He didn’t care when they sent him to an all boys school. He didn’t care when his headmaster told him to quit writing about the insignificance and miserable auras love brought. He couldn’t care. Why should he? And he really didn’t care when he snuck out and slept with the town’s prostitute for two pence.  He became so obsessed with being a lustful man who cared not for true feelings, that he lost himself.

He graduated academy and decided to spend a month in Monmatre, France. He figured it was a great decision. What man wouldn’t? Monmatre had wine galore, the infamous Moulin Rouge, and some delectable bread. Sure, he would be a fish out of water with his accent and love for all things other than art. But he didn’t care. 

He had an marvelous time for a few days: sex and plenty of wine. But in Monmatre.....He just kept looking for something...Anything... A sign? He tried going to Sacre Cœr to see nun. That confrontation did not go well at all. In fact, she needed a priest to come half way through and dump quite a bit of Holy Water on him and herself.  The boy just left feeling worse, and for once, he cared. 

Walking down the numerous steps he caught the eye of a girl. She appeared his age, possibly younger. She didn’t look at him. She was looking at a small piece of parchment and had the smallest smile on her face. He walked past and lost contact right as she brought her cup of espresso to her perfectly pink lips.

He had never done this before, but he turned around and sat at a lonely table at the little patisserie. He just ordered a tiny bit of coffee and sat. He sat and watched the girl gaze over parchment  after parchment  and occasionally sip her espresso. That’s all. When she was finished, she tried to pay the bill. But the waiter only told her this: “Madame, the gentleman over there says thank you for changing him. You owe nothing.” And the waiter left her.

Well, she was having none of that. She marched right over to the gentleman who had paid for her meal and asked him: “What is wrong with you sir? I’ve seen you staring at me for hours. Now why exactly do you feel so obliged to do so?” 

The boy was amused. He grinned a little grin and laughed, “Why mademoiselle, is it a crime to stare at a lovely little lady?” He tried to look at her smolderingly- the other girls had loved it.

But this one was having none of that. “Look, monsieur, I’ve seen your kind before. I’ve seen plenty of eligible bachelors trying to catch my attention by doing the same things you’ve done just now. But I can assure you, you won’t win with me. I refuse to be used. You must court me. You can start by learning how to look at a lady, and then you can pick me up tomorrow at noon for a picnic in a park within fourteen meters from here.”

The man dropped his mouth lightly and replied, “Of course mon cherie.”

“Don’t call me that.” And she walked away. He didn’t leave the cafe until it was dark outside. Then he went back to his apartment and stared at the ceiling, waiting until mid morning to arise and go the patisserie to get bread and wine packed into a small basket with a blanket.

When he saw her come up to the same table she sat at yesterday he nearly ran. When he got to her, he said, “hello”, oh-so charmingly. 

“Well hello there monsieur. Out of breath?” She said and then smirked.

“You.....you...ah....you look....you look lovely.” He breathed while noticing her pink paisley dress. It was just the softest pink, like the first blooming rose of spring. 

“Got a stutter there? You know, a speech impediment isn’t usually eminent in boarding school boys.”

“I don’t have a speech impediment- you just took my breath away.”

“Calm yourself Monte Cristo.” she said.

They walked to the park and spent the whole time playfully arguing. Not about anything really. Just to hear what the other had to say. Just to hear the other person talk. Just to hear each others voices. He set down the basket and laid out the blanket, and then squinted his eyes, for it was very sunny, whilst putting out their meal. She just stood and watched. He held out his hand to help her sit and laughed gaily when she refused.

“Why are you laughing at me?” she asked defensively.

“Why must you ask that?” he replied, “I’m laughing because you detest chivalry. What woman detests chivalry?”

“I don’t know. But I do know that I am a lady who detests chivalry because it is an act. An untrusted act of kindness to hide a drunken, ill-behaved man who will marry a woman and then beat them.” she replied sharply.

He held out his hand, and she placed her palm against his. It was warm. And the back of her hand grew warmer as he brought it to his lips. Just a sweet, harmless gesture, but her heart nearly left her. She quickly mover her hand and reached for the wine.

“Mademoiselle, perhaps chivalry just brings out the reasons girls break boys hearts and drink old.”

“That’s fair.” He laughed his little laugh at this.

She laid back in the sweet green grass. She just laid down and closed her eyes. Her dark brown hair sprawled about her face, and then she her a thump and a sigh. He had laid down too. Oh no....He’s going to get too many ideas and try to pull something.... she thought. 

But he just laid there.

He outstretched his hand and she laid her palm on his. Things were just nice. He loved this. He loved no sex. He loved that she was a real girl, and how she had this magic about her that no one had ever had before. He loved that she was just as intelligent, if not more so than him. He loved that she didn’t succumb to him and made him work. 

He was falling in love with her.

The two became great friends that summer. When fall’s sullen chill began to spread over Paris, the boy decided to buy his apartment. He’d come from millions, so it was no issue. He was learning everything about this girl he loved. And he loved it.

She told him everything, and he told her even more.

Everything was wonderful. She would read for hours as he just rested by her. She would read every book she could get her hands on, and he would just study her. The way her eyebrow moved if there was a far too happy ending to the story, the way she pursed her lips when she didn’t like a character. Especially the way she would cry when there was a sad ending, and she would just lean on him and let the tears pour down his shirt and she explained why the ending was beautiful to her in broken words. But, his favorite thing she did was sigh and then look into his eyes when the protagonist told his heroine he loved her for the first time. 

She had the softest eyes. It killed him that he could not lean in and tell her the same thing. Especially when she looked at him like that.

One day, she was reading a short story about a writer who had fallen in love with a lady of the evening and how she died of tuberculosis in his arms one night after refusing to sleep with a duke that could give her everything. She sighed. She didn’t cry this time, she just sighed. And he was waiting for those five minutes of excruciating pain when she would look at him with her doe’s eyes. But she didn’t. She just put the story down. and sat quietly.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

She just turned to him and left her face close to his. She didn’t say anything. She didn’t lean on him. She didn’t pucker her lips. She didn’t close her eyes. He leaned closer to her. He smelled her sweet perfume, which was really no perfume, just her natural stench of something sweet, and asked, “Can I kiss you now?”

She immediately got up and said, “No! No you may not!”

He was wounded. He just laid back down on the grass. She walked away. She left him in the grass as she marched back to her apartment. She shut the door quietly and went to bed.

They didn’t speak. They didn’t speak for  a week. He would walk be her building each day and just look at the window she claimed. But he did not go up.

One day as he was staring at her window, she ran out to him. She stood in front of him, grabbed his face, and brought his lips to hers. It was a sweet kiss. It gave each person a sense of the sorriness they both felt.

“There. Are you content now?” she asked.

He took his time to open his eyes and found her staring at him with her doe eyes. He just pulled her chin up to his once again and let their lips meet. This time he just told her he loved her. That’s all he tried to say.

They went back into her apartment where he just sat and talked as she played her piano. She didn’t know how to play, so she made up her own songs. She did, however, write one for him. It was strong and harsh at first, but then turned soft and melodic, and sweet. And finally ended solemnly. It was his turn to cry.

He laid his head in her lap and cried.

 He went home that night. And when he went to see her the next day. She was gone. She was at her piano with an open book next to her. 

He cried for a week straight before he moved out of Monmatre and went home. He never looked at a woman again. He couldn’t. 

He cared too much. 

A ton of Cereal!

So....I've been watching a lot of Victorious reruns while ill.  And guess what!


I've seen a bagillion Mr. Kate cereal necklaces in gold! They're so cute and playful!
 And Mr. Kate is an amazing, macrobiotic, actress and jewelry designer with an awesome blog!  Seriously! And she's getting rid of a lot of inventory to bring in her new Artifact (Decay) collection! Check her out! Not literally, she's got a boyfriend...  ;3

But seriously! And just to add to it, she uses real gold, silver and bronze on her very affordable jewelry!

I highly recommend visiting her site!

http://www.mrkate.com/products-page/

Sick....bleghh

So I'm sick, and it's not a flu, and it's a mystery infection, and they think it's mono!




KILL ME NOW!



I'm so achey, dizzy, nauseas, and I have a swollen gland and congestion and an ear ache and a cough, and my throat is getting sore!



Irrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!




If it's mono, I'm killing my boyfriend!


Not really, but I'll hate him....a lot...

Updates Du Jour!

Mmmmmk!

So I totally and completely love Ariana Grande and wish she was my best friend!
She plays Cat Valentine on Victorious on Nickelodeon! And I've adored her from the start! She co-stars with Daniella Monet whom I also adore!


Second: I have a mystery infection. Dun Dun Dun! So my lovely mother took me to urgent care the other day because of a swollen gland I have (it hurts like a mother!)  And it's pretty gross. I'm convinced it's getting bigger everyday and I'm going to die from it-hypochondriac, remember?- but the Doctor says Azithromycin will solve all issues! Even though- the doctor had no clue how it appeared!

Where's Dr. House when you need him?


And she said I would be fine!


I think I'll make her my new doctor! She had soft, warm, motherly hands- not cold, cracked and intruding. Huzzah!


Okay- So I'm going to get back to my Advil, Steel Magnolias, and On Demand awesomeness from AT&T!

Oh.... I love cable advancements!

Well....that's kind of it....

Oh, and people still hate me! Woooo!


Okay, till next time! Hopefully I won't have a tumor! haha :3



P.s.    Michoacana Ice Cream bars are better than Haagen Daz AND do not use eggs!

ever feel like...?

Do you ever feel like everyone hates you when you try to help and offer collective ideas and sympathy and comfort?


Every one hates me. I've  got the Formspring to prove it.....



Maybe I'll just become really really quiet.

Worldlink

          Went to the Woldlink conference today about trafficking. (Drugs, sex, arms.)
Learned so freaking much! It was a wonderful experience! One of the best parts was running around the location looking for a coffee shop with two of my good friends Kristin and Brynna! We were also scouting for navy boys, because we were right by a military base....so lots of lovelies. We all almost fell over at least once! And I got two cups of coffee because they made my drink hot, when i wanted iced in 80 degree weather, so i just took both and enjoyed the iceed on the walk back to the conference room and then drank the hot caramel macchiato while in our final meeting.

Twas a pretty great day!


Mkkk.... I'm going to go wash my face and then put on some rerun television!

xoxo

Today's duds.

It's hot! HOT I tell you! Just kidding!

It was actually lovely outside today! mid-70's weather. YUM!


 So I wores this!

And then I had some fun on photo-shop!

I love how you can take one scene and turn it into a billion different things! WOOO!

I like the simplicity of the first one, the darker edge of nature in the second, and the delicacy of the last photo.

What are you all wearing this in-between winter and spring time?

Favorite music of today

Florence + The Machine :  Blinding    [in general]

My Chemical Romance : Cemetery Drive

..... and it's a photo shoot with myself....

[set to Dancing With Myself]

Dancin' with myse-elf

Tango meltdown

What to do with you?

You sure you don't want a rose?

tearing off the petals

feeling sorry

my fave

all better

 Because I was bored..... I still think I should run up to Anthropologie....





Oh! And the photo that made me do this!

Creamy love....mmmmmm!

Okay....So, as you all know, I have a SICK obsession with Anthropologie.
And....there is one by my house. Walking distance. I also have a gift card. Huzzah!

So.....Should I go? I really want this dress!!!

this dress!

Should I go?   

Yes?

No?

Maybe?

So?

TELL MEH!

Nothing.

I've got nothing to write about.

So cut to family.

I love my baby brother more than anything. And my mommy and my dauddy.


And....I love the song Beth (glee versions) and Cemetery Drive (My Chemical Romance).


Oh and got a new guitar named Lisa Marie today. She's black and gorgeous! Hell yes! There is excitement!

And...... I'm about to watch Despicable Me with mi hermano!


xoxo

favorite music of today

Today, my favorite song is the Glee version of Beth.

Favorite band: New Politics.


Look 'em up!

I'll do it for you. :)


Beth

New Politic:

Because it's beautiful.

getting dressed to do nothing?

Have you ever had a day where you said, " I'm going to do this, this and this." and then did not?
That's what I did. I didn't want to after hearing the news about the shootings in Tucson.

So I said my prayers, grabbed a load of food and began waiting for newer reports.

I think we should all say a prayer for the families affected. And if you don't identify yourself with religion, then at least send positive thoughts.

Whore.

So, it's OFFICIAL!


I am indeed a Youtube whore. I can't help it. I just get so carried away searching various videos for hours!


This is one of my favorites...ACOUSTIC!

Keeping it "polished boho"

Before I said I didn't have a specific style, I've now decided my style is polished, comfy, boho.




Here's the kickoff:

Worn with my pink stripe tube socks and another pair of plain white knee highs scrunched to an inch above height of boot shaft.

Pale pink sweater, Anthropologie; teal shift dress, Ross; brown boots, www.urbanog.com ; belt, no clue- back of my closet.  :3

Thoughts?

Easing up, but keeping busy

My New Year's Resolution is to not stress myself out so much. (We'll see if I succeed :/ )

With stress comes bad sleeping habits and even diseases like insomnia or sleep walking. And if your sleeping is affected, your diet becomes affected as well. You pick whatever you think will feel you up faster: i.e. greasy veggie burgers, cheese pizza, nachos, beans and cheese and french-fry burritos, chips, soda, a caffeine addiction increases, you drink less water and migraines break down your brains doors.

Well, I'm ready to relax myself. I mean, I don't need to be doing two back to back shows, and worrying to keep my grades up, and doing 14 different acting, dancing, or voice and diction workshops a day, or stage managing and being in various clubs at my campus.

I'm just stressing myself out too much and it isn't healthy. So, this semester, I'm focusing on school, no shows, (because second semester is only Junior and Senior produced shows) and a mock-trial group as well as delving into research for my dream character.

If you really must know, it's Desdemona from William Shakespeare's Othello.  In June, my conservatory is having open auditions. About three hundred people are estimated to audition. I don't care. I want Desdemona. I am Desdemona. (Not literally, but in a very much theatrical character sense!) 


I don't know what the connection is, but I just revere this woman that Mr. Billy Shakes' wrote about so long ago. She's so strong, but so fragile and naive. I can't help but connect to every word she says and every emotion that could possibly come out at any breath. It's so hard to explain.... It's like.....I don't even know. 


I just would have the absolute most splendid time working on all the layering and connecting it would require to be Desdemona. 


I just.....I just find it wonderful.


Well that's my huge goal for this year (fall).


But my lifetime goal is just to be healthier and do what I can balance. I know it sounds like "this gizratch is complaining about all these things when I do this, this, this, this, this, this, and this."


But it's not. I'm just saying I want to be healthier. I feel better when I'm eating fruits and vegetables throughout the day and then have a killer dance workout and then treat myself to some strawberry ice cream.
I'm not dieting though. Diets do not work. They just don't. Making healthier choices is very, very, very different from dieting. I'm not obsessed with losing weight  or being a fitness freak.
If I want a burrito the size of Chewbacca and a Coca~Cola the size of a space ship, I'm going to partake in the poppycosh. I'm not going to deprive myself, just choose an apple over pie (not a fan of pie, plus egg issue) Or add veggies to my dinner rather than just a bowl of pasta.
You know what I mean?

Okay, now I'm rambling....

So, tell me your thoughts, comments, profanities, fears, resolutions, etc.

Favorite band of the day:

Pearl Jam!

Check them out, they've been around a while, and they just get more and more awesome.

Awaiting Spring

Today I wore this:

Floral Shift dress F21, Brown boots Target, skinny braided belt vintage,  big scarf F21, two vintage watches (Fossil and Sharp), Gray socks Target, flower ring F21

New Year's Rockin' Eve!

Spent new years with my nine year old brother...(I know, big age difference!) and a friend of mine. We had lots of fun watching the ball drop, eating fresh fruit and a yummylicious dinner, and playing board games! :D

We didn't have anywhere to go (I lack a car), so we had our own party and put on lots of glitter!
I channeled my inner Lady GaGa whilst she tried to channel some Snookie.
Here's the results!

Well....Thats what we do. Hope you all had a great New Years at some kickass party!

xoxo